Thursday, July 29, 2010

Blame Jane Austen

I have a small confession to make. Well, it's more a friendly warning.

When a lot of people get dumped they write morose poems and devote themselves to making that person's life as miserable as possible. Or worse, they become doormats and allow themselves to be walked on.

While I can't say I haven't participated in any of these popular break-up activities, I can say that I have tried to limit them in my life. I have certainly written my fair share of "love lost" poems (usually they are immediately destroyed or covered up never to be seen again, because after writing them I feel silly and pathetic). I have made a valiant effort not to seek vengeance in these situations, however I have been known to make a stinging comment or two in the presence of said "ex." These are usually hidden messages meant to only be understood by me and the guy... or anyone else who knows what happened. However, I do realize this is wrong and so, I continually fight my desire for "so called" justice.

I have been a doormat in the past, too depressed to accept that it was over (or... was never going to happen) and attached myself to the man; ready to drop everything and do what he wanted to do... just in case he ever decided to change his mind about me. Luckily, most of the guys I have dated weren't pure evil (at least I don't think so.... okay, with the exception of Chad... who I didn't really date, thankfully) and didn't take advantage of the situation.

However, In recent times I've fought those tendencies; those habits that a lot of people struggle with, and instead I've found a new way to channel my emotion.

I choose to get my vindication through Jane Austen, and by that I mean I give each man who "wrongs" me the identity of a bad guy from one of the books. I change his contact information in my phone to that character's name and each time I receive a text from him... I smile a little.

Freshman year at Harding I was hurt by a fellow student and he became George Wickham from Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice.

In more recent times I was burned by Sense and Sensibility's John Willoughby.

Generally their new identities are given based on their similarities of behavior. Now, before you chide me for my immaturity, it's not meant to be mean... because honestly, its just meant to be just a joke to myself. It prevents me from doing any outwardly vengeful things and most of the time... the guys gifted these separate cellphone identities end up becoming my good friends.

I wouldn't change their names in my phone, if I didn't think they'd eventually find it kind of funny. So, I guess what I am trying to say is... If you end up dating me, be prepared for the consequences of breaking my heart. You could end up being the next Mr. Elton.

Peace and Love

No comments:

Post a Comment